This Is Your Life.
I’ve been writing a lot about happiness lately. In fact, my last two articles (The Path to True Happiness & The Path to True Happiness – Part 2) were all about improving your happiness. For the past five years, I’ve made happiness a more important cornerstone to my life. That’s not to say that I wasn’t happy before; it just means that now I am more intentional with what I do or don’t do based on the happiness that it provides me.
For something to provide me happiness, it has to feed or fulfill me in some important way. In fact, happiness is all about positive emotion, engagement and meaning. It’s living the right life for you and not sitting on the sidelines.
Are you stuck where you don’t want to be? Do you even know if you’re stuck? I love the quote by Rosa Luxemburg, “Those who do not move, do not notice their chains.” Sometimes, we’ve been in the same place for so long that we don’t realize that there is so much more out there. We accept our place and keep our dreams small…or buried, covered by a layer of fear and regret.
When we don’t venture out to embrace all that we can be, we stop short of living a life of true happiness. We have to find our own path. For me, it started when I embraced and sought out those things that truly make me happy. I call it my “Happy List.”
Here’s my abbreviated list so you can see what puts a smile on my face and joy in my heart:
– Time with family and friends; sharing life with the ones I love
– Travel to areas that enrich my life
– Taking as much time off as I want, when I want
– Being fit and healthy and able to maintain an outrageously active lifestyle
– Pushing myself mentally and physically
– Doing work that feeds my soul that I’m passionate about
– Making the world a better place by making a meaningful impact
– Helping and inspiring others to reach their potential
– Constantly growing and learning for optimal performance & living
– Being financially secure so I am not stressed over money
– Having life-balance
– Expressing myself creatively
– Serving my God-given purpose
– Not setting an alarm clock
I suggest you come up with your own list if you don’t have one already. A huge part of being happy is related to the work that we do. Does it give us meaning? Are we engaged? Are we able to leverage our strengths and pursue our passions? And does it give us the time and resources to fully engage in non-work passions and interests that add happiness and fulfillment to our lives. Let’s face it, no matter how much you love your work, all work and no play is not a way to live for ultimate happiness…at least not for me.
If you are doing work that you love that gives you meaning and purpose and you have the balance in your life to do all the other things that are important to your own happiness, then you are where you need to be. If not, you need to look at your own “Happy List” and determine what you need to do.
For me, I determined a long time ago that to have the “happy” life I craved, I had to create the work that I wanted. And I would also need to create a career that would give me both the financial freedom and the flexibility that would allow me to pursue all of my other non-work interests and passions.
So how did I make it all happen? To bring all my “happiness” requirements together, I had to first create the vision and then build a lifestyle business that would give me what I wanted. I was very intentional and purposeful in the process.
A lifestyle business is one that enhances your lifestyle; the one you want to live. And that is different for each of us. A lifestyle business should make you happy and fulfill you. How much you work, the amount of money you make and the type of work that you do is up to you. You are the architect, so you need to build a business that works for you. It should be a business that serves and supports all of who you are and what you value the most.
It’s easy to rationalize what you have now and say, “It’s good enough.” But after you make your “Happy List,” you will be confronted with the question that you have probably ignored, “Am I living the life that allows me to be my happiest?” Look at your list closely. Examine where you are. Compare it to where you want to be. Are you on the right path? Or are you on the wrong path?
If you are like me, a lifestyle business may be the right happiness choice. After more than a dozen years of crafting and building the right business for me, I have some secrets of how to build and sustain a lifestyle business:
1. Take Risks – First and foremost, you have to be willing to put it all out there. As E. E. Cummings said, “It takes courage to grow up and be who you are.” Are you brave enough?
You can’t have a lifestyle business as long as you are working for someone else. If you can’t pry yourself away from the security and benefits of your 9 to 5 job, and take the scary but exhilarating leap, then you will never have the complete freedom and control that you need.
2. Build It – Unfortunately, it doesn’t quite work like Field of Dreams – “Build it and they will come.” It’s not that easy. It’s not that simple. And it doesn’t happen overnight.
Despite all the get-rich-quick schemes that tout instant success; it rarely happens that way. You’ll have to put in the effort and work.
3. Be Better – The world doesn’t need another (fill in the blank). There’s no sense in building a mousetrap, unless you build a better one. How are you better than everyone else that does what you do? Seth Godin’s book, The Purple Cow speaks to this. Unless you are remarkable and amazing, why bother? How are you going to be the purple cow in a field of black, brown or white cows? How will you stand out? Not just for the sake of standing out, but because you are not the same in a good and positive way. A way that better serves your customers.
4. Follow Your Passion – One of the problems with get-rich-quick schemes is that they are centered around making money, as if money is the salvation for our happiness. I have seen and worked with many people who are obsessed by the money. Now, I realize that having enough money is important, but if you are always chasing the money; you are missing out on so much of life. Money will come when you are able to follow your passion. Don’t chase the wrong thing. If you get sidetracked or blinded by the money, go back to your original “happy” list to ground yourself on what truly matters.
5. Shift Dreams To Reality – It’s not enough to have a dream; although it’s critically important that you have one. But you also have to shift your dreams to reality and create strategies to pursue your passion in a meaningful way. You have to take action that gets you where you need to go. You have to do whatever it takes and take 100% responsibility for your success (or failure). It’s all in your hands.
6. Focus – It’s not just about taking action, it’s about taking the right action. Focus on the most important tasks that will drive your success. I call these your “critical” items, and there should only be a handful of activities that make this list. Don’t get bogged down with the countless activities and time-suckers that really don’t matter in the long run. One of the main purposes of your lifestyle business is to allow you freedom to have time for all aspects of your life. It’s about working smarter, not harder.
7. Leverage Your Strengths – Research from Marcus Buckingham says that we are happiest and most fulfilled when we are using our strengths at work. For example, if you are strong creatively, you would enjoy projects and work where you are able to use your creativity. If you’re not sure what your strengths are, check out Buckingham’s book, Strength Finder or talk to me about taking an assessment that can pinpoint your strongest skill sets.
8. Be An Expert – Without a doubt, being an expert is one of the most valuable strategies to growing and sustaining a lifestyle business. People and organizations seek out experts and pay them handsomely. As an expert, you’re able to provide more value, do more meaningful work, and create more of an impact with your clients and colleagues. In other words, you can make more money and enjoy your life more (because you have more time available) while doing work that you are passionate about. Building expertise is an ongoing process.
9. Pursue Change And Growth – Because expertise is not a destination, but an ongoing journey, you have to be prepared to be a lifetime learner. Not only do you want to continue to grow in your chosen area, you will likely find paths to pursue that will branch out from your primary route. You are valuable to your clients based on your depth of knowledge and experiences and how you can share that in meaningful ways.
10. Over-Deliver – If you want to grow your business, you have to grow your reputation. And the best way you can do that is by the work that you do. Be the best at what you do and you are on the path to long-term success. Make sure you are giving more than what your customers expect. Wow them! Dazzle them! Make them look good and feel great for choosing to work with you!
11. Be True To Yourself – We often find ourselves doing what we are expected to do. We get the degree so we can get a job. We take a job that will pay the bills. The list goes on.
Don’t go through the motions in life. And don’t waste time pursuing a direction that doesn’t fulfill you. Happiness means being authentic. So if you want to build a successful lifestyle business, you have to be true to yourself.
Sometimes it takes some time to figure this one out; but once you do it’s liberating. I wore a suit to work for 25 years, partly because I was playing a role that I thought I had to play to be successful. I also set my alarm, was the first person in the office and the last one to leave. I was playing to the expectations of others and what I thought I should be doing; not what was authentically right for me.
12. Be Grateful – It’s easy to take things for granted. Gratitude is a powerful motivator that will keep you humble, giving and present. All of these attributes will make you the kind of person that you and your clients will want to hang out with.
Having a lifestyle business that allows you to do what you want to do is something you shouldn’t take for granted. It’s a gift of utmost abundance; a gift deserving of our utmost gratitude.
