For as long as I can remember, whenever I heard someone use the phrase “my daughter’s attitude,” I immediately pictured a snotty teenager with her hands on her hips, stomping her feet, rolling her eyes, talking back to her parents, and slamming her bedroom door. Maybe those images are in store for me somewhere down the road, but for now, my 18 month-old daughter has provided me with a completely different experience of “attitude,” and it had a profound effect on my workday this week.
It was Tuesday morning. I’d just finished outlining my plan for the day, and my wife (Amanda) and I were having breakfast. In general, we tend to discuss work-related topics over breakfast, sharing our itineraries and upcoming projects, exchanging advice on respective work challenges, etc. The topic on this particular morning was how to systematize Amanda’s interactions with physicians. It was an engaging conversation, and as always, I slipped into my usual problem-solving mindset.
On several occasions, I’ve noted that starting my morning in this manner has an effect on my attitude throughout my workday. On one hand, I love having a few minutes of one-on-one time with Amanda before we part for 11 hours; it’s absolutely a component of our great relationship, and it always feels good to share this time with her. On the other hand, I’ve noticed that problem-solving with Amanda first thing in the morning, every day for a few consecutive weeks, results in my brain being primed for going into auto-pilot problem-solving mode.
Of course, problem-solving is useful in a multitude of situations, but it’s not necessarily appropriate in every situation. There’s an old saying, “If you’re holding a hammer all the time, everything around you starts looking like a nail.” And that’s what I noticed in myself: Every morning, I was setting myself up to think in terms of “problems,” and this had an effect on my approach to fostering and maintaining business relationships.
Something happened this past Tuesday that snapped me out of my “problem-solving habit,” and I was reminded of the powerful influence words and topics of conversation can have on one’s day.
In the middle of the intense discussion we were having about Amanda’s interaction with clients, a loud, melodic voice came drifting down from my daughter’s loft. Her voice thundered into the kitchen, and we immediately stopped our conversation and burst into laughter. Our daughter was screaming the word “HAPPY” at the top of her little lungs, over and over again, emphasizing different parts of the word each time she said it.
Happy!
Ha- Ha– Happy!
HA- pp- Y!
HAaaaapppyyyyyy!
Happy! Happy! HAPPY!!
Suddenly, and without even thinking about it, Amanda and I joined our daughter’s impromptu, Happy Song, shifting immediately into a completely different attitude–one of humor, celebration, and, of course–happiness.
This little interaction lasted only 5 minutes, and yet, it had a notably-positive effect on my attitude for the remainder of the day. I found myself more patient with clients, more deliberate with my word choices, more light-hearted when faced with challenges, and just happier overall.
Now I’m not suggesting you scream “HAPPY” at the top of your lungs every morning as a way of making sure your day goes well. I am suggesting, however, taking note of the things around you that often go unnoticed–things that affect your attitude, the words you choose, the programs you watch on TV, the articles you read, your topics of conversation with friends, co-workers and family members; these things all have an impact on your mood and your general outlook, and they do affect your behavior in the workplace.
For the next few days, try paying closer attention to these things and how they affect your attitude. Notice how being exposed to things that feel good (intentionally or inadvertently) have a positive influence on your attitude, and even on your interactions, at the workplace and in your personal life.
It’s amazing what my little girl teaches me on a daily basis. I thought I’d share it with you this time! (Thanks Logan!)
