I spend a lot of time with clients working on beliefs. We all have them. However, most of us don’t recognize the ones that we hold on to that limit us, block us and even derail our success. Do you?
Think about all the areas of your life – career, relationships, health & fitness, community service, spirituality, fun & adventure. Are there things that you say, “I can’t do that because…” or “I’d like to, but…” Listening to how we hold ourselves back with our own language is the first step of the process. It’s becoming aware of our deeper truth. So listen for the “can’ts, won’ts and buts.” Listen to the excuses and rationalizations for why it can’t be done…or why “now” is not the “right” time.
I was recently working with a group of managers and a self-professed “crusty, old dog” who was only about 18 months from retirement stated that he was “serving his time.” The good news is he cared passionately for the organization that he had served for 32 years. And he always put his customers needs first. The bad news, however, was that he had reached a point in his career where he felt like he had done all that he could and that it was “too late to teach an old dog new tricks.”
So I used a technique that I discovered by accident years before. I agreed with him. Truth be told, if he believed it was “too late,” he was right. And if he believed it “wasn’t too late,” he was right. A wiser man than me, Henry Ford, said it years before, “If you think you can do a thing or thing you can’t do a thing, you’re right.”
But I took it a step further, I used his own words and the words of others throughout the program to help “contradict” the evidence that was supporting his belief that it was “too late.” It was subtle. I didn’t tell him he was right or wrong. I simply brought contrary evidence to his attention without calling him out or pushing it on him. And after creating awareness, that’s the next step…to change a belief, you have to look at the evidence that contradicts that belief. It’s only after you review the evidence that you can see things differently. It’s in those moments where you have the opportunity to shift a limiting belief for one that will better serve you that real growth is created.
The story has a happy ending. A story where learning and growth took place and new possibilities emerged. Are there new possibilities for you to discover? It starts with beliefs.
